Managing your frustration

“How are you able to always do this?” He asked me. I was working with him on finding a way he could engage in reasonable conversation when he was frustrated with the other person’s position. My first thought was: well it’s much, much better than it was, but there are still times I can’t quite manage it 100%. I still have to take a breath and choose to respond constructively when I notice I’m getting frustrated. That got easier as I kept doing it. It’s now a blip before I can switch, when it used to feel more like a crashing wave once upon a time. But I get that he’s probably experiencing the crashing wave-like state right now, so I told him that I have learnt to choose how to respond and he can too.

There’s no substitute for lived experience. I set out on my own path to working through frustration when I understood that I would have to get better at it if I wanted to accomplish the things I envisioned. Nobody else was blocking me. It didn’t make sense for me to block myself, so I had to act. All that I’ve learnt conceptually and all the wins and the setbacks I’ve experienced help me guide other people on their journey. Their context varies, but the process is well established. I know first-hand how easily we sometimes slip into deceiving ourselves, and how hard it can be to start doing something unfamiliar. But it’s a process, you don’t have to get it all right from the start. Give yourself some grace. You’re surely a resourceful person. If you want it, I’m sure you can make it work for you. I wish for you that you do: it’s incredibly empowering. And I’d be happy to walk alongside you if you like.

Curious? Give me a call.

photo Sam Keefe on Unsplash